thisbigcheese

come back so i can say yes this time do it again now that i know what to call what you did.
this time i’ll be ready i like it rough now and i’m done with romance i never met another man who loved me so much at first sight he had to hurt me to do it.

Daphne Gottlieb (via feellng)

:(

We had our biggest argument this morning, and I honestly thought you would have pulled the cord on our situation. One part of me really feared that you would, but the other part of me thought it would be better for us both in the long run if you did.

I still remember how happy and carefree we were in London, and I genuinely wonder how something which started off on such a happy note could have unfolded to what it currently is. If this was any other guy, I would have known that everything was nothing but a bag of lies. The only conclusion I can come to is that we both sadly take drastically different interpretations of the events that have transpired. Good intentions and innocuous acts / omissions are misinterpreted, leading to hurt and/or frustration.

I don’t know how we can move on from here. Can I still be who I once was with you telling you about anything and everything without having to fear that you might misconstrue this as me looking for greater commitment, or do I have to hold back in which case I wouldn’t be myself, wouldn’t be the girl you first met? And would you still share with me the little nuggets of your life and could I still ask without you thinking that I’m trying to pry? Nonetheless, thank you for trashing things out with me. I’d rather this than have negative undercurrent whenever we converse; it never was like that and it should never be.

没想到会这样怀念你。真的不知道我们是否会有将来。虽然彼此都说顺其自然而事实也真的只能这样,我心理真的很怕到时候会受伤。真的不想再次这样,你知道吗?真的怕到很想对你说我们之间就到此为耻。

对不起了 🐻

现在的情况只让我痛, 让他有不必要的压力。真的想进进他大脑看是否后悔当初认识我。俗话说, 长痛不如短痛。不知道现在放手会不会对彼此都更好。他为什么还是那么有耐心的哄我, 向我解释? 有时候, 我真的不知道自己会这样是不是因为暗中希望他会让这一切结束, 而我就不用冒以后会像七年前那样伤心的险。交往中的我不是关心太多,就是什么也不管只在乎自己的自由。我好像还是走不出当年的阴影。我知道你不会看到这,但对不起, 再次让你烦恼了。我根本没有条件让人关怀;忙绿向勇往直前追着事业梦想的我或许就是最脱档的我吧-那忙到没有时间去感受爱情的我。